Thursday, October 06, 2011

Prof’s radical advice for successful black women: Marry outside race

This is from Mary Mitchell's column from last month. A subject tackled on this blog many times before:
[Stanford Law professor Ralph  Richard Banks] argues that if a lot more black women were to marry outside the race, it would solve a number of problems now plaguing the black community: “Fewer black women would be alone. Just as some black women marry down rather than marry out, other black women remain unmarried rather than partner with a man of another race. There is a shortage of men only if black women remain confined to a segregated market.”

Additionally, he points out that black women who marry outside the race could bypass many of the hazards of the single life — “unsatisfying and nonmonogamous relationships, the increased risk of sexually transmitted diseases, abortion, single parenthood.”
Then here's a quote as to why Black women are less willing to date outside of their ethnic group:
He even came up with a list of reasons why more black women aren’t open to dating white men:

“Black women don’t think white men are interested; black women trace their love of a black man to the love of their father; white men were seen as lacking ‘swag,’ and partnering with black men was a way of fighting racism.”

As one 40-year-old married woman from Oakland told Banks: “We should never give up on our black men. Never. We have to support them. We know it’s a struggle, but we women got to stand by the black man. If we don’t, who will?” She asked.
I'm pretty sure there are some black men out there who would disagree with that. Do Black women really support their Black men?

Look, I would marry a black woman in a heartbeat more so than any other race or ethnic group out there. I don't believe profession or occupation should get into the way of a good relationship. Income shouldn't matter because you're both building together. Ethnicity shouldn't matter and I would dare say age shouldn't matter.

That's not to say those are factors in a break-up at all because they can be. I'm sure between two people whatever their differences if the magic isn't there, there will be no magic between those two people.

Now back to that quote, I do wonder how much Black women do support Black men. I'm sure there is a black men out there who will claim his woman got successful and left him behind. Could that be his fault because he could never reach her level or is it her's because she may insist that her husband has to be on an equal or better level with her.

Can someone clue me in?

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